Deeter's "The BYU game from New York-Washington DC"

At parent teacher conference, Mrs. Silverberg presented me with Deeter's story he had been working on but "ran out of time." The detail is impressive and needs it's place in history so I'm transcribing it here. "I went to New York on Wednesday right after school and we got there at 10:30 pm. We took a uber to our apartment and our fish named Chris. We had a very good view of Downtown Manhattan so we went to bed. In the morning I was on the balcony for one hour and then I went inside and my family was awake. So I hugged my mom and went downstairs and said hi to Chris and then ate a bar and then looked at Downtown Manhattan. So we woke up ate breakfast at the mug cafe. I got apple juice, eggs and bacon. My family ate good food too! Then we bot six bananas and then took a subway to brooklyn bridge park. We looked around and we saw Downtown. My dad two brothers and one sister had ice cream. My mom bot me a crepe it looked really tasty. Then my brothers came and got one. After that we walked across the Brooklyn Bridge and bot souvenirs and then we went home for a long time. Then we went to the Play Aladdin, and the gini was very funny and the play different from the movie. The next morning we went to Prospect Park for one hour. Then we took a 90 minute boat tour. Then we took a train all the way Washington D.C.! We got there at 7:30 pm, so we went to bed at our apartment called 425 Massuchussets Street. So we woke up had breakfast at Wicked Waffle. We had waffles with chocolate syrup powdered sugar and yeah. Then we walked to the white house where the President lives. We saw a Police on the roof. We found a spot to run. I watched a squirrel eat on a tree eating little by little. Then we raced it was fun like parks should be. Then we went to look at the Washington monument. Then we went to the lincoln memorial and counted the 87 steps. We went to a lot of places but we needed to be prepared for the BYU game. So we went home and relaxed for a while. Then we got an uber to redskins stadium were we play West Virginia. even though we were away they let us sing our fight song. So now the game has started. We kick off we tackle them. We force a punt. We return to the 50. We had a 10 yard pass to nick kurts. Then we ran it to Jamaal Williams tis we got to the 40. Then we punted. After that they got a 85 yard pass to Gibson. Then they ran a 5-yard touchdown to Shell. That put them up 7-0. So then we returned to the 45-yard line we scored a touchdown. They threw another long pass to Gibson again. And then scibor howard ran in. Before half time we got a feild goal to make it 14-10. Then hifo got an explosive return. We scored another touchdown." And this is where he ran out of time....! I'm dying at his detail. Especially the football game. I watched the exact same game as him and could have told you about 0 of those plays. Also, the illustrations are pretty impressive. Definitely a keeper.

Dallin B

Dang, I've had a few tiny things that I'm like "How am I going to remember all these details that I absolutely don't want to forget?!!" They're insignificant, but they're of my boy. 1)my B man brings a Sparkling Ice to school. Everyday. Like it's a necessity. And I can't help but support it because I totally recognize what this dumb bottle of juice represents to him- freedom, maturation, something bigger than he was a year ago. I don't know exactly why but it melts me. 2) Since B started school he's made a new friend, Helen. I'm trying to think when the first time I heard about her was? I remember hearing her name, and then I remember I would see B walking with her every now and then on my weekly car pool run. I also remember B coming home one day saying that Helen's dad had a stroke (or some medical misfortune). I asked him if he wanted to make cookies to bring to her and he did. So we (ahem...ME) made cookies and he brought them to her at school with a little sticky note saying he hoped her dad got better. We were at a volleyball game a couple days later and she was there (apparently her mom is the vball coach) and looking for me nonetheless. She wanted to make sure and thank me for the cookies. Off and on, I've heard a little more and asked him if he likes her etc etc. Digging for specks of info without prying. There's also been talk about Dallin's friends' girlfriends. ???? Yes, we are in 6th grade and the male/female spark has been lit. Anyway, yesterday B came up to me and was all, "Mom, can I ask Helen out just to make everyone leave me alone?" Or something like that. Main points being, 1)he wanted to ask Helen out and 2)he was asking me permission to do it.  If we're being honest, add a million exclamation points right here. My boy asked me permission for something personal which just shows a level of trust and teamwork has been achieved between us. We had a small conversation about a couple of things (why he was really wanting to do this, ie: do you really like her, what each of us thought girl/boy relationships should look like at this point and down the road (thankfully we were on the same page)) and then I said I thought that was fine. I'll be honest, I played it cool on the outside but something funny was happening on my inside! My B's getting older and it makes my heart kind of want to do a slow small burst. Probably just with pride because man, he's a good kid, but it's a different feeling and all my heart knows to associate it with is a little sadness or hurt or something. But really it's just a tender feeling.
So there's all that.

Alchemist Thoughts

Recently I've felt the need to read The Alchemist again. I feel like those are strong words-- "felt the need"- for simply talking about a book but you have to understand, I describe The Alchemist as a life-changing book for me. And guess what? Via my perspective, I'm not exaggerating. A year or so ago, I picked up the book that I had heard so much about. Not the story particularly, but the book. Mainly it was described to me as "an interesting read" or "I think you'd like it" or "it's just this little story but it's good". All of which are true, but this interesting little story I did in deed like, changed me.  So sitting at a somewhat stagnant point in my journey with a lot of questions and a lack of personal clarity, I've been wanting to read the book that brought peace and deliberate action into my life. Round 2, want to know how far I've gotten? Through the introduction. But now might be a good time to pause and say the introduction might be my absolute favorite part of the book. It's not a fable or allegory with interpretation left up to the reader. It's concise, words are not minced, it's straightforward and nothing short of inspiring and personal. In fact, it starts out talking about our own personal calling, a calling from God. And does this ever resonate with me. I feel like this is a thought I'm constantly running circles around. This reading I've been inspired to do something different about the age-old thought-- I've been praying, asking God to help me see more clearly what that personal calling for me looks like. Obviously I have some ideas since it's clear that this purpose is from within and has always been in our hearts but clarity isn't my strong suit.
As I kept reading about the obstacles that stop us from achieving/chasing that personal calling, specific goals and dreams came to mind, each of which I'm at varying points of pursuit.  1) running at 8 min/mile half marathon  (completely on hold, and maybe even forgotten or dismissed, until reading this) 2) being a mom  (have dreamed of this since a little girl. and while I know and remember that, my dreams are lacking detail. I want to add color to the sketch and have it be a more satisfying realization of my dreams) 3) be a teacher (have the opportunity to teach seminary now. how am I pursuing the dream of being an excellent teacher?)
These bullet points alone have brought so much hope and purpose to my journey in these last few days. I have to figure out how to keep them on the front burner and keep them as a motivator. One thing I knew I had to do was start journaling about them and get the ideas edited and solidified to a tangible place. Check mark on that now!
(PS I finally just bought the audio book version of The Alchemist and have LOVED listening to it in the background of whatever I'm doing. But can I already  point out the HUGEST let down??? The intro isn't part of the audio version:(( )  

A Time to Kill thoughts

I just finished watching “A Time to Kill” again and that movie never loses it’s ability to stir all the dormant feelings to life. I know the movie is framed to portray the desired dichotomy- the rambunctious white boys alongside the calm, family oriented black community; the white’s disrespect for the law versus the black’s law abiding citizens. I see that it’s a picture being painted for me rather than a complete reflection of reality. But I get it. And mission accomplished to start a very controversial chain of events.

The movie does so much more than illustrate the difference between black and white, the injustice that lies in color no matter how hard we try to ignore it. Or no matter how hard we try to accept it. That’s not the first time that reaction has been pulled from this movie.

This time, more blatantly was the underlying tone that controversy is far from clear cut. When one decides to take on a position to defend, it doesn’t matter what the issue, there is always obstacles that leaving you guessing, and then second-guessing time and time again both yourself and the issue. We see how we’re forced into sides. That come strong enough there’s no room for middle ground, for playing it both ways.

And that strikes me at the core for some reason. I think the older I get and the more unclear the lines are that I see, middle ground is the only place that feels safe. It’s hard for me to wrap my head around the idea that we can both be right, or wrong for that matter, on any given issue. Maybe it’s because of our current position in the maturation process of said issue that has our heart telling us two distinct differences that we each feel called to fight for. Maybe it’s the way we were raised that blinds us to other possibilities. Maybe it’s fear, or faith, or ignorance, or liberty that won’t allow our minds a different perspective. I don’t know but it makes it all very confusing to me. I don’t even know why i want everything to be so clear cut to me but I can tell that it’s super bothersome that it’s not. 

In his closing argument, Matthew McConaughey states that we all have an obligation to seek the truth with our hearts. He issues an abandonment of mind and pleads for an intimate inventory of the heart. Was Matthew McConaughey fighting with more of his heart than Kevin Spacey? I don’t know. And what if they were same amount heart, that Kevin Spacey believed Samuel Jackson’s guilt and corrupt motivation with the exact same amount of heart that Matthew McConaughey believed his innocence and temporary insanity? Then what?

This is why conflict leaves my head spinning. This is why I feel like I avoid taking a stance on a lot of things, that there is no clear right or wrong. But then writing it out and watching a movie that so beautifully illustrates the exemption of middle ground, it beckons the same rule that Matthew McConaughey won with— we have an obligation to seek truth with our own hearts and then roll with it. Let your heart be the judge and allow the passion to follow. Be willing to eat your words if that time comes. Be willing to be humble and be humbled. Be willing to fight for something that will lose. And don’t worry, I’m not preaching to you, simply to myself.

(also written on the way to Hawaii. Better late than never, y'all.)

Werk

On the way home from the baseball game last night, Porter was all cute talking about The Fam. “Dang, it’s not going to be the same in Hawaii without it being the six of us. It’s just better when we’re all together.” Now, if there’s something more that warms a mama’s heart, I don’t know what it is. Jack Johnson said it best when he declared, “It’s always better when we’re together.” Maybe that’s why I love Jack.

That being said, I know in theory even if not always recognizing it in practice that there is a flip side to every sacrifice. And I already know one in this case. I’ve recognized it from young the lack of chemistry in Porter and Deeter. Innately it just isn’t there. I’m sure we could go into factors that contribute to this but that’s not the point of my post. Also, I have made mention over the last couple years that there are more and more moments of improvement, even where they enjoy each other’s company. Lately, there have been quite a few common interests- basketball on the Daily’s trampoline, the X-Box, fantasy football, football and I can’t think of more, but they’ve been occurring. They more often than not occur when Dallin is out of the picture. It’s a default system that forces them to either thrive alone or figure each other out and I feel like they’ve been doing a real good job at the latter. So here we are on a 6 hour flight to Hawaii, and those two boys have been cuddled up playing the iPad together and sharing headphones to watch Aladdin together and they’re building memories. Between the two of them, a relationship that needs a lot of those moments to sustain what started out as lack of chemistry. It warms my heart to see these boys become true brothers. That’s worth a sacrifice. 

(written on the way to Hawaii in June '16, just now saw it again and need it in the forever files)

HI,Honolulu

HI, Honolulu so, porter went to Stephen Curry over night camp, he had a very, very fun time, and Curry went in to porter's  dorm room his roommate fainted! Stephen Curry taught them his ball handling drills and shooting drills. before that, we spent 4 days in a condo we discovered 7 Brothers, and right by there, there was a place with shaved ice which is a snow cone that's shaved. we went the polynesian cultural/culture center. it was really fun. we went to watch ha/the breath of life, it was amazing, and we went to a luau also amazing and we discovered pounders. we went in to a new house we also went horse back riding for 45 minutes. went to a hole Lot of beaches. my favorite beach was called Hukilau porter's camp is over now. we went to a resort called turtle bay for  10 to 4 ,then we left for our flight.


by deeter hansen

Once in a Lifetime

It's small but huge, unexpected yet not all that shocking. But since it's personal, since it's my experience, it's everything on the bigger scale. It is huge, it was unexpected, and it was the best reminder ever that things do work out for me in the way I want them to from time to time. Porter started talking about this Steph Curry camp and after a couple mentions I told him we'd take a look at it. Google showed that there was in deed a Steph Curry camp and that-- of all places-- it was being held at BYU-H. Y'all, if BYU-H wasn't already supposed to be in all caps, I'd be writing in all caps because HAWAII. Quick time out to give the strong reminder of how much I love Hawaii. Google actually had other information for us as well. The camp registration was closed, as was the waiting list. Camp full. My heart sank. Halfway for Porter, halfway for me. The thought of a Steph Curry camp being at a church school blew my mind. What are the chances??? Even after knowing this for 2 1/2 months, it still blows my mind. The merging of all things good was happening. Well, it was happening for 200 other people, but not Porter. The disappointment set in but life went on because that's what life does. Normally, I'm pretty quick to move on. Missed opportunities aren't that stunning to me. I'm pretty go with the flow and of all the opportunities I've missed out on over the many years, only 2 have regrets attached to them. 1) I should've gone to a portion of the World Cup in Brazil with Yosh. 2) I should've gone and seen Jack Johnson in concert for his Here and Now tour. All other missed opportunities have got little more than a shrug of the shoulders and an it is what it is response. But not this. I couldn't shake it. I've expressed- although not strongly enough- my love for Hawaii, and then the praise hands for this camp being held at a church school. On the other end, though, we had Porter. Porter had a rough second semester of school. There were multiple calls/emails home from a teacher or two, a call home from the principal. We had "moments" to say the least. BUT... But at home we had this kid who had awakened a dormant ambition to be better at basketball. And who infused that desire? Steph Curry. Who was that teacher on how to be/get better? Steph Curry. Porter watched countless You Tube videos on shooting technique, dribbling drills, etc etc and then spent literal hours doing the work. Basketball was the ying to his school yang. It was inspiring to watch. As we were trying to instill inspiration in Porter to improve his behavior at school, who did we naturally refer to as an example? Steph Curry. We found inspirational quotes that resonated, that made Porter want to a good person on and off the court, to work hard on and off the court, and he did. He put in the work at school too. All these details combined to create a disappointment that warranted much more than the shrug of the shoulders.  I knew there just had to be a way to remedy the sitch and my heart confirmed that by not letting it go. I did something out of my comfort zone and emailed a friend who grew up in BYU-H (in fact her dad worked there) to see if she knew of an in. Please! But to no avail. She had no in, her dad no in. But a couple days later she emailed me saying a Facebook friend had posted that the Oahu Marriott was auctioning off one ticket to the Steph Curry camp. For me, this felt like a mini-miracle! One, that there would be an unorthodox way to get a ticket, and two, that somehow I got my hands on that knowledge. To submit an auction, you had to do a write up about the potential participant. It was so great to take a minute and articulate our Porter and what this camp would mean to him. Here's the email: A little history about my son, Porter— he is nine years old and a basketball fanatic. Although basketball has been his favorite sport for a couple of years, starting a few months ago, he spends every spare moment on the basketball court practicing shots or doing dribbling drills. It has been super fascinating to watch my creative, aloof, forgetful kid turn into a dedicated, deliberate, ambitious child all because of basketball. Steph Curry has quickly become his hero. He rotates daily between his 3 Steph Curry t-shirts. He watches Steph Curry video clips and then goes and applies the Steph Curry work ethic to try to improve his own skills. Needless to say, he’s both a huge Steph Curry and basketball fan!

Unfortunately we only heard about the Steph Curry camp a few weeks ago:((  I was sooooooo disappointed to see it was already full. Because in addition to Steph Curry being my son’s hero, two of my sisters went to BYU-H and I was able to visit them once at the campus. The colliding of Steph Curry with BYU-H has left me with such a strong desire to somehow make this camp a reality!!!!

Thank you so much for the opportunity— hoping that we get lucky!  

I didn't want to get my hopes up too high but I also felt like the chances were stacked in my favor. I mean, how many people were really going to hear about this auction? And of those people, how many would be willing/able to get to Hawaii for it? BUT, you never know. Enough people wanted and were willing to go that both the camp and waiting list were full.

So the waiting began. The auction closed on Cinco de Mayo. At home we were "celebrating" with the cheers-ing of Mexican Cokes but meanwhile I was checking my email way too often, even though I also reminded myself that we were operating on Hawaiian time. Which meant that not only are they 5 hours behind us, also ain't nobody in a hurry over there. That was Thursday. Then Friday. I knew there was no chance of hearing anything over the weekend. So I thought maybe Monday by 10 pm I'd have an answer. And then if I didn't, Tuesday I would reach out.

But Monday at 6 pm, we got the news...Porter had won the entry.

My goodness, luck is on my side from time to time and this was one of those times! I remember leading up to this moment, thinking, "If Porter wins this spot, it's going to be a true testament to me that God is aware of the little things and that, despite my perspective that my dreaming rarely goes according to plan, sometimes the dream finds the finish line." I'm thankful for the hype leading up to this moment so that I was ready and could appreciate the gems when they came.

But PORTER WAS IN!!!!

 We waited to tell Porter. In fact, we told Dallin first because unfortunately timing is such that Dallin is the only kid that doesn't get to make the trip:[  (He made the All-Star baseball team and the tournament starts right before we leave.) In true Dallin fashion, he accepted it like an absolute champ and then figured out a way to surprise Porter. He taped a packing list for the camp to a basketball and then asked Porter if he wanted to go outside and shoot.

True to form, Porter was (or played??) confused. An explanation was necessary and the as the days have passed, the excitement has only grown! Good times lie ahead and I am beyond ecstatic to be the chaperone on this adventure!